l am pregnant.
Pregnant?
l know. l know. l can't believe it either.
Ramona, Rachel's pregnant!
Pregnant?
And because l quit my job l've got no money
so l couldn't pay my rent.
Now my landlord's kicked me out.
l called but you were engaged.
Can l stay here for a while?
l'm pregnant.
Pregnant?
l know! We couldn't believe it either!
Right. Well...
l think that's everything.
Thanks for having me, Peter.
- l really do appreciate it. - David...
Rachel's pregnant.
Pregnant?
Don't forget to pay the window cleaner.
And the help. She only did two hours this week.
Shall l write it down? David, will you just go, please?
- Thanks again, Pete. - l really do...
David...
Bye.
Could l stay here for a while?
Ordinarily it'd be no problem,
but David's moving back today.
- We need a little time to get things sorted out. (Key turns in lock)
Oh.
- Hi. - Daddy! Daddy!
Hello, Joshy, you big shrimp!
- Happy? - Hello!
(Whistles cheerfully)
TV: Throw-in. A bit more pressure this time.
That bit of passion from United has created a chance for them. We want more of that.
The players have to show some character now, some spirit.
They know.
(Doorbell rings)
Aaaaaaaaargh!
Hello. We've got a really big favour to ask you.
l thought you were getting heavier.
You didn't say anything.
l'm learning, mate.
Oh, there's one thing...
- Yes? - About Laura.
lt doesn't change the way we feel about her, does it?
l already think of her as my daughter.
l've been running through my mind
the speech l'll give her first boyfriend. And the hiding.
The rows we'll have when l teach her how to drive.
How l'll miss her when she leaves home.
- No.2 will be around then to soften the blow. - Aye.
You don't think...the age gap will be a problem, do you?
Not at all.
Couple of years, Laura will be able to baby-sit.
True.
- Hmm. - Hmm.
(Whispers) The spare-room lamp is bust.
l'll just take er...
my one.
Oh, it's good to be home.
The children are glad you're back, as well. Josh particularly.
That's a lovely picture he did me.
What was it of?
You, David.
Putting the dragon to the sword.
l'm going to be such a disappointment to him.
Oh, yes, it's good to be home.
Better be getting back to bed.
(Sighs) Oh, it's so nice.
Oh, yes...
Hi.
Well, hello. ls Pete in?
He's still in bed. Want me to give him a kick?
Er...no, no. He's probably...
shagged.
l'll call back when he's less busy.
- l'm coming! l'm coming! - Hang on. He's coming now.
- Hiya. - Hi.
Hey, is it OK if l have a shower?
Be my guest.
Oh! l forget! You are!
(Laughs emptily)
Oh...
- Who is she? - Come in and l'll tell you.
Yesterday evening. At a loose end. Went for a drink. Celebrate.
- Rachel's pregnancy? - David's departure.
So, anyway...
l'm at the bar, tossing up between a curry and a Chinese,
when suddenly...
Oh, my God... Oh, l'm so sorry!
l thought you were someone else!
- Who? - Her brother.
Anyway...
once we've cleared up that misunderstanding,
l buy her a drink, and we get talking.
Then it's back here and it's ''Wham, bam, thank you, ma'am.''
O-o-o-oh...yes.
l can't believe it. She's only bleeding gorgeous!
She is bleeding...gorgeous.
Jeez, you're a jammy bastard.
- Hi! - Hope you don't mind. l found this.
l haven't unpacked yet.
Unpacked?
Oh. Adam. Er...married to Rachel.
Ah. Adam.
Congratulations. l heard your news.
- Pete's been talking about me? - No, no. Rachel told me.
Jo! Oh, right, yeah.
So you heard about my drama.
l needed somewhere to stay so Karen put me on to Pete.
So you two haven't had sex?
(Party music and chatter)
l'm fine, thanks.
(Softly) God almighty.
These things were bad enough when l was half-cut.
Now they're deadly.
- Do you want to leave? - Yes, l do.
But we'd better give it at least another five minutes.
There's Henry Maguire.
l'm hoping he might put a bit of work my way.
Erm...will you be all right on your own?
- Yeah, fine. - l won't be long.
Henry...
You know it's illegal to stand on your own at a party like this?
l'm sorry?
Technically, you should be mixing.
Making polite conversation
with people you've never met before and won't meet again,
and whose opinion you don't give a damn about anyway.
Oh, right. ls that what you're doing now?
No, you see, l'm working er...
deep undercover for the party police.
lf people are too dull l simply show them the door.
Haven't got very far, then, have you?
No.
So, have l passed?
Oh, yeah. Just about.
Thanks.
- Can l get you a drink? - No, thanks. l'm driving.
So am l.
That must make us the dullest people here, then.
OK... So we want...
- Can l have a strawberry milkshake as well? - Of course.
Do you want a small or a large?
Stupid question. Very sorry.
- You know they make them from potato peel? - They don't.
They do. That's why it smells of poo. No, they do.
They mash up all the bits of potato they don't use in the chips,
get some old horrible milk
with bits in it, throw that in,
and bingo - milkshake. Gorgeous.
He's making it up! Go and get a seat!
l'll do this.
l'll have to get used to eating here.
Believe me!
She is a lovely girl.
She is.
- So how long have you been fostering? - Twelve years.
Ten children. Not all at the same time.
lsn't it hard giving them up?
Always.
- lf you don't mind me asking... - Why do l do it?
- Why do you do it? - Well, someone has to.
Besides, l get a lot out of it.
l mean, take Laura.
When she came to me a year ago, she was in a dreadful state.
Didn't want anyone touching her.
Wouldn't look you in the eye.
She was all the time on at me, ''When are we eating?'' even if we'd just ate.
Why?
She'd never known where her next meal was coming from. Literally.
- Oh, God... - lt's wonderful to see the change in her.
Hello.
- Look what l got. - Agh! Ooh! Er! What is it?
- l don't know. - Nor do l. lt's cool, though.
Jean, can we see their house after this?
Well, l don't know. l...
lt's only round the corner. Rachel said l can see my room.
lf that's all right.
- Er... Yes. - OK.
Here we are.
Tell me...do you work?
Yeah, l'm a brain surgeon.
Really?
No. Just sounds more impressive than ''housewife''.
There's nothing wrong in being a housewife.
Yeah, l know that. lt's just, in this day and age,
a housewife has the same social status as the long-term unemployed.
Hm.
- So what do you do? - l'm a househusband.
Really?
No. lt just sounds more impressive than ''publisher''.
ln a previous life l used to be in publishing.
What did you do?
l was an editor.
Well, if we weren't already talking,
someone really should introduce us.
What sort of stuff do you publish?
Well, lifestyle, mostly.
ln fact, we're doing one at the moment on the modern woman.
How she can have it all - job, family, the works.
Hmm. And what about the pressures to have it all?
l...don't understand.
Whether we're wearing pinafores or power suits,
we're still all imprisoned by stereotypes.
The truly liberated woman is the woman who does what she wants.
How come that's not in my book?
Because you don't have a decent editor?
Well, the job is yours.
l already have a job.
Oh, yes, you do, don't you?
Well, fair enough.
But maybe you'd do me a favour and consider...
reading it,
and letting me know what you think.
You know, as a woman...
in your position.
OK.
(Clatters)
Shit.
Hey, hey, no, it's all right. Don't worry.
- (Sobs) - Oh, ssh...
- Look... - l'm hopeless.
lt's nothing, look. lt's only a plate.
No, l mean my life.
Just as l was starting to get settled here, making friends,
everything goes wrong.
Look, it can't be that bad.
l've split up with a guy,
l've got no job,
l'm broke, and l'm homeless.
- Well, when you put it like that... - How else can you put it?
OK. Erm...
You're young, free and single.
lt's summer, so who wants to work anyway?
Money's the root of all evil...
And how about this one? Erm...you can stay here.
Oh, and my period started, as well.
l can't work miracles.
Anyway, thanks for trying to cheer me up.
Thanks for letting me stay.
l don't know where l'd be without you right now.
- Big lssue? - Yeah, probably!
Oh, come here. Don't worry.
God, l must look like shit.
Excuse me.
You look all right to me.
ADAM: This...would be your room.
Oh, wow, it's huge!
We can paint it a different colour.
- Pink! - Er...
- lt could do with an undercoat. But why not? - Do you like it?
lt's brilliant! Can l try the bed?
Yes, of course you can!
ls that a phone point?
- Er...yes. - Wrong answer.
Yeah, l'm in my room.
Listen, is your mum still being a bit eggy about Friday?
Eggy?
Great! Lovely!
Pete, do you think everything's defrosted?
Oh, yeah. The heat'll kill any bacteria.
Well, l'll do something useful and prick these.
You often hear of women getting pregnant when they've given up hope of conceiving.
Yeah, but when doctors have said they can't?
- ln the Catholic church such miracles happen. - True.
- So, how far gone are you? - Four months.
Four?! But what about your periods?
l just put it down to the stress of the adoption.
You want to fan that. Get the heat going.
l know what l'm doing!
l love the summer! Women wear so little.
- Yeah, Karen looks very tasty. - Aha!
Yeah.
Still?
l thought you two were back on.
We are, but...we weren't exactly having sex before l moved out.
- She was pissed off with you then. - lt doesn't seem to be on the agenda any more.
Get that back, mate. You don't want your love life confined to the bathroom.
l'll go and get some more beers.
Before l kicked him out l couldn't bear for him to touch me. Now...
it's not like l find him abhorrent.
But...
l don't know what l feel, really.
- You've got to fancy him again, that's all. - l know.
l just don't know how to.
Look, l know what l'm doing, all right?
- OK. No need to get eggy. - Eggy?
l didn't know you were into self-help books.
lt's not mine. l bought it for Jo.
The Crumbling Cookie - How to Have Your Cake And Eat lt.
- What a load of bollocks. - Oi! Don't knock what you don't know.
ADAM: Oh, my God! You fancy her!
- Who? - (Sarcastic) Judith Chalmers! Jo!
- No, l don't! - lt all makes sense now.
The barbie, the presents, the oh-too-vehement denial.
(Sing-song) You want to be her boyfriend!
- Just piss off, all right? - So is the book any good?
He thinks l don't take it seriously enough.
l didn't say that.
- He sets me little exercises. - Does he, indeed? Right!
Make two columns.
Your strengths...
and weaknesses.
Oh, God, that'll be one-sided.
Come on, you must have some weaknesses.
OK...er...
Skills! What about your skills?
Skills?
You know - typing, shorthand...
Languages?
Australian English? Maybe not.
Oh, no, hang on. l know.
This shoulder dislocates sometimes,
but l can pop it back into its socket.
lsn't that more of a weakness?
l tend to put it into both columns.
Which shoulder? This one here?
- Can you feel it crack? - Wow! Yeah!
Aren't you minding them sausages?
- Aren't you in advertising any more? - l had a better idea. Well, Pete did.
Personal trainer.
l qualified in Oz and there's a big market for it here.
l'm her first client. l need to lose a couple of pounds.
Personal trainer...
l know l look great, but l could get in better shape.
- No, you're fine! - Yeah, sign me up.
No! lt's my idea!
- Maybe you could do it together. - Put David down as well.
- No! - Me?
- You could do with it. Put on a bit of muscle. - Good idea.
- Great. Right, Pete! - Yeah.
lt'll need a couple more coats before l can paint it pink.
But the meeting went well, yeah?
- Yeah. - Terrific.
- She even asked if she could leave this here. - Great!
- We're picking her up from school tomorrow. - Looking forward to that.
We said we'd take her shopping for a new duvet.
As long as it's not pink!
Reports from her foster mother are really positive as well.
Great. Coffee!
There is one thing we want to ask you.
We haven't mentioned this to Laura yet.
lt's just really advice as to when to broach the subject.
You see, l'm...pregnant.
Sorry?
Not dissimilar to my reaction.
But l thought you...couldn't.
Well, that's what we thought, too.
But...apparently, whilst unlikely,
it's not so rare that it counts as a miracle.
The thing is, should we tell Laura before or after she moves in?
l'm sorry, l don't think it's as simple as that.
- How do you mean? - Well, this could change things.
Why? We've talked it through. We still want Laura.
Yeah. Just as much as before.
This isn't about you. This is about what's best for Laura.
Well, we are!
l need to talk to my superiors.
ln the meantime, l don't think you should see Laura.
- What?! - We're picking her up from school tomorrow.
No. We need to discuss this.
What's to discuss?
l'll see you tomorrow. We'll talk about it then. OK?
(Grunts)
ls all this gear new, then?
Yeah, pretty much. These shoes are state-of-the-art.
Bi-directional outsole lugs,
posterior metatarsal strap,
and the very latest in pod cushion technology.
What's all that about, then?
l haven't a clue, but they were bloody expensive.
Adam's cutting it a bit fine.
l gave him a call. He was in a right paddy.
Forgive the pun.
- Says he can't make it. - He's got no stamina.
Yeah. Wuss!
(Door opens)
Have you done five minutes?
- Oh...er...at least. - OK. Before we start,
- l want to ask each of you about your goals. - David?
Blimey. Erm...financial security, perhaps a little place in France...
No, l mean from doing this.
- Oh, right. - What do you hope to achieve by getting fit?
Er...
Well...
♪ Soaring violins
- Oh, David! l love you so much! - (Groans)
David?
Um...better health...
improved cardiovascular...whatnot, that sort of thing.
OK. l think l know what you mean. What about you, Pete?
♪ Romantic music
Oh, Pete!
Oh! You drive me wild!
Take me. Take me now.
Pete?
Same as David, really. Yes.
OK. We'll start off gently to begin with, so l can get a sense of what you're capable of,
then we'll take it up from there.
Let's start with a gentle jog, then, shall we? Follow me.
- Would you like a coffee? - Yes, please. White, no sugar.
Jill, two coffees, please. White, no sugar. Thanks.
So...
- You read it, then? - Yep. Cover to cover.
Not that it has any.
And?
lnteresting. The author, Geraldine Pascoe...
she makes some interesting points.
Good.
Trouble is, she makes them badly.
Ah.
Let's face it, Mark, the woman can't write, can she?
She's an academic by training.
Well, that explains it, then.
lt's dull, dry, dreary. And the chapter on parenting - you can tell she has no kids.
Yeah, we...decided not to have any.
Sorry?
Geraldine Pascoe.
She's my wife.
No.
Oh!
Oh! l'm so sorry!
No need. We're very happy, thanks.
l had no idea.
Because l didn't give you any.
No. No, you didn't. That was not very fair.
And would you have been as honest if l had?
No.
Look, Karen, you're really not telling me anything l don't suspect already.
As you know, l'm committed to this book.
lt would really help me if you would take it on.
You know, knock it into some shape.
l don't know. How would your wife feel?
Look, why don't you meet her?
You and your husband come round to ours for dinner.
l'm sure you'd get on.
ln many ways,
you and her are very similar.
(Pete retches)
- Oi! Mind my shoes! - What did you take 'em off for?
My feet are killing me!
- Are you feeling better now? - No! l've just thrown up.
- 1 50 bloody quid! - Well, at least you looked good.
Not when he was hobbling.
75 quid a foot.
Look, you said we'd take it easy at first.
We did. Any easier, we'd have been walking.
At least he wouldn't be throwing up and l wouldn't be crippled.
OK. Well, maybe we'd better pack it in for now.
- Yes! - Call it a day.
Suits me.
Who are you phoning?
A cab. To take me home.
Oh, drop us off on the way, will you?
Sit down.
Would you like some coffee?
No, l'm fine, thanks.
l'm sorry. We can't allow the adoption to continue.
- Oh, for God's sake! - lt wouldn't be fair on Laura.
What, and this is? She already sees us as her parents!
ln less than six months you'll have a child of your own.
Think how that'll make her feel.
We'll make her feel wanted, loved, part of a stable family.
All the things we said we'd do when we were approved to adopt.
l'm sorry. This is a far from easy decision.
- lt seems far too bloody easy to me! RACHEL: Adam...
Rather than rock the boat, just call the whole thing off.
lt's precisely because of Laura's future...
Bollocks!
Think of the damage if the adoption breaks down.
- lt won't break down! - You can't know that for sure!
We'll do everything we can to make it work.
l don't doubt that...
of either of you.
But with the greatest will in the world,
it's too big a risk.
Does Laura know about this?
Not yet, no.
Why does she think we didn't pick her up from school?
- We told her you couldn't make it. - Oh! Great! Make us look like we don't care!
l'm not trying to make it look like anything!
What happens next?
lt'll go back to panel.
But they're likely to accept our recommendation.
Well, we will fight you.
Bloody social workers playing God!
We can't be trusted with a child?
They shouldn't be trusted with a decision! Screwing lives up!
No wonder they've got such a bad reputation!
Hey! Hey, hey, hey...
Rach... Rach...
We're not going to give Laura up.
This isn't over, OK?
Come on...darling...
OK?
Oh, you look great.
Come on, we'll be late.
David, come on.
Ah...
- Agh! Ohh... - Are you all right?
l'll have to sue the makers of those shoes.
And your friend Jo.
- Hi. Nice to see you. - Hello.
Thanks for coming. Please go in. Hello, David. Hello.
- Are you all right? - Yeah.
- Hi. JO: Hey.
What are you doing?
Adding motivational skills to my weaknesses.
Oh, come on! lt wasn't that bad.
No, l guess a cab firm benefited.
Look, you can't blame yourself for David's feet.
And l probably wouldn't have thrown up...
if l hadn't had those crisps.
Excuse me? What crisps?
Prawn cocktail. Oh...
- Pete... - l'm sorry. l was hungry.
Maybe you could give me dietary advice.
Don't eat crisps before a run.
Oh, and try to cut down on the beer, huh?
l don't really want to give you a critique of your book over dinner.
You'd have to be pretty foolish not to accept criticism from an expert.
Well, an expert on publishing, not sociology.
- Not for me, thanks. - She can't.
l'm driving.
But Mark did say you had a few suggestions about changes.
Yeah, one or two.
l think you'll find l'm very open to ideas.
Great... Good.
OK... ln the chapter on marriage you use yourself as a case study,
which l think is fascinating.
But l thought
it would be better to write about somebody more widely known - say Madonna.
Good. No shortage of material.
No.
No, l don't think so.
Next?
OK. At one point you say that you think
that women shouldn't have children unless they've been married at least five years.
That's right.
Well, do you not think that's a little...
Fascist.
..prescriptive?
l mean, surely you want your book
to be observational, not didactic?
No, l'm not going to change that.
Was there anything else?
No.
No. l don't think so.
The salmon is delicious.
(Typing)
Hey, l've had an idea.
This woman used to do lunchtime yoga classes.
They were always packed out. Why don't you take over?
But l don't do yoga.
Aerobics!
Pete, that is a terrific idea!
That's why you pay me. Well...
What does ''Suitable for both sex and all abilities'' mean?
No, no! lt's not supposed to say that!
lt's supposed to say ''Suitable for both sexes.''
How do you stop this flaming thing?
(Machine bleeps)
Oh! Just pull the paper out!
(Machine bleeps repeatedly)
Pete, you're a genius.
This could really be something.
Why are you doing this?
How do you mean?
Well, even my parents aren't as nice to me as you are.
Why am l doing this?
lt's simple really.
l've fallen in love with you.
You're sexy, you're attractive, you're fun to be with.
And you're the best thing that's happened to me since Jenny.
Oh, Pete...
Why am l doing this? l don't know, really...
l'm just a nice bloke who...
who needs to get himself into shape.
Laura's in the care of the authorities,
so it's their decision to make.
Do you follow?
Sorry, l was a wee bit distracted.
Your flies are undone.
Oh...
Thank you.
lt never impresses in court.
So we haven't got a leg to stand on?
Oh, you'll never hear a solicitor say that.
No, we could apply for a judicial review,
asking the court to determine
- that halting the process was unreasonable. - lt was certainly that!
- ln your unqualified opinion. - They matched us with Laura.
lt was going well. Everyone said so. Then they stopped it.
New information came to light.
- Which we didn't keep from them. - We didn't even know it!
- They must review it with Laura's best interests. - Us! We're her best interest!
How long will this take?
Somewhere between three months and a year.
We'd apply for an interlocutory injunction
to stop Laura being placed.
Oh, l think we've a strong case, don't you?
Well, at best, l'd say you have an outside chance of success.
They're being unreasonable!
And besides, surely the fact that we're prepared to go to court,
with all the expense that entails,
that shows our determination to make a good home for Laura?
- How much would it cost? - That doesn't matter.
- lt does. - l'd estimate not less than £20,000.
What?!
- So that's that. - No, not necessarily.
Adam, it's 20,000 quid. Minimum.
But if we win, we get costs.
- Since when have you been a gambler? - l bet on the National.
£20,000 on a rank outsider?
- We can raise the money. - How?
- And he said it'd take months. - Three!
To a year. And we'll have a baby by then.
They won't place Laura in the meantime.
- But the stress of a court case. - Most of it's just waiting.
Why are we doing this? For Laura. We gave her an undertaking. We won't let her down.
So if l have to beg, borrow or steal
to show her what she means to us, then it's worth it.
(Sighs deeply)
l had to get out of a meeting for this.
lt's the least you could do, the damage you did to Jo's self-esteem.
So chucking your guts up was a vote of confidence?
Why can't you call it Keep Fit?
l mean... (Posh) Aerobics. lt's so...feminine.
- Hey. - Hi.
- David! l didn't know you were coming. - He was dead keen!
Weren't you?
Well, better start the music.
Do you know if many are coming?
Oh, l wouldn't expect too many,
because it does clash, you see.
l thought it was lunch hour.
Er, yeah. That's what it clashes with.
ls this the class for male strippers?
Oi, mush, what do you think you're doing here?
l may have missed one session but l'm not a quitter.
l need to get fighting fit.
ADAM: Speaking of fit...
Just a minute. This is for my firm only...
- And David. - But Jo rang me.
Adam, hi.
Hello!
Hey, we'll have you at the back.
With me.
(Upbeat music)
OK, everybody, let's start off with some gentle warm-up exercises.
And...breathing in...
..and out.
ln with the good...
and out with the bad.
And up...
l've heard you didn't get past the warm-up exercises before.
And l heard why you didn't make it. l'm very sorry to hear it.
We'll take them to court.
- Can you do that? - lt's a free country.
JO: ..and four...and reverse... - And it's a pretty expensive one.
Look...if we can be of any help - borrowing money or something...
Oh, right. Thanks. Yeah.
And pelvic...
One...two...
Got 20 grand on you?
How much?
Let's cut out the chatter at the back,
get some serious work done.
ln my youth l might have accepted an author dismissing my opinion like that.
Actually, even then l would have had a problem with it.
Yeah, l know Geraldine can be...
a tad...forthright.
But she had to be to get on.
Just out of interest, Mark,
exactly how do you think we're similar?
Well, you both have um...strong opinions,
and you don't back down easily.
Which, you must admit, wouldn't make for the easiest working relationship.
Please don't quit!
l am not quitting, Mark. l don't have a job to quit.
l'm trying to offer you one!
l'm sorry. l don't think l can work with your wife.
Suppose you didn't have to.
You make the changes you want.
- She'd never accept that. - Look, Karen...
Geraldine might be a little...difficult, but she's not stupid.
She wants to be read by the world at large, not by academics.
Do you think you can handle her?
Well, over the years l've er...
learned a couple of tricks.
Patience being one of them.
Judo another one.
You'll do it?
- Yes. - Excellent.
l'll get Accounts to call you about money.
They'll try to screw you. Don't let them.
You might regret saying that, mate.
l very much doubt it.
Right, how about lunch on Thursday,
to go over the changes you want to make?
Oh, God! Here! Use that!
Aw! Jesus!
Have you been at the crisps?
God...
That went well. They want to know when the next session is.
And it's all thanks to you, Pete.
You should get more people along, once word of mouth starts.
Yeah. Well, stick with it, and l'll give you a brand-new body.
Tom Cruise's?
- Good idea. - You like him?
- No, but Karen does. (Phone rings)
- Excuse me. Hello. DAVlD: A month? l suppose l can wait that long.
What?
Jesus. l'll be straight there.
What is it?
Rachel's gone to the hospital. Stomach cramps.
- Are you all right? - Fine.
- Have they seen you yet? - Yep.
- The baby? - lt's fine.
l was so worried.
Let's drop this judicial review. Nothing's more important than you and the baby.
- Adam... - Strain caused this.
- We can't risk your health. - Adam, l am fine.
Then what was it?
Does it hurt here?
Yes, it does, yeah.
(Farts)
Oh, my God. l'm sorry! l'm really sorry.
ls that better?
- Wind? - Apparently it's quite common.
l raced here scared shitless because of wind?
Yes.
Ah!
Thank God for that.
Let's drop this case. lt's your health, Rach.
No. For a minute in there l thought l was going to lose the baby.
And then l realised we could lose both of them!
l want to fight, Adam.
For us as well as Laura.
That sounds absolutely fantastic. Brilliant.
Great. So when do you want it by?
Right... The 25th.
The 25th of next month, yeah?
Er...
You are joking?
Didn't l say time was pressing?
Yeah, pressing, not suffocating.
No wonder you said not to let your accounts department screw me!
Advice l notice you more than took to heart.
So, come on, what do you reckon? Can we make it?
We can certainly try.
Excellent... Excellent. Waiter...
What do you want to drink? Champagne?
Not for me, thanks. Just water's fine, thank you.
A large bottle of fizzy mineral water.
Don't let me stop you.
No, no. l never drink alone, you see.
Why? Watching your figure?
No.
No, l don't drink...
for the same reason...
as you don't drink, l imagine.
So, tell me, how long has it been?
Listen, l'm not sure l want to talk about this, actually.
No, it's er...
l am so sorry.
lt's really out of order. l apologise. Sorry.
Sorry.
Six weeks.
Wow.
- What about you? - Me? Oh, well, you know...
Just the 1 2 years.
(Splutters)
Twelve years?
Bloody Nora! How the hell have you done that?
l really don't know. l haven't the foggiest.
Day at a time.
One! Two!
Three! Four!
Five! Six! Seven! And up!
One! Two!
Three! Four!
Five! Six! Seven! And knees!
One! Two!
Three! Four! Five!
Higher, Dudley! Seven! Eight!
Good work, Pete!
Three! Four!
Five! Six!
You didn't drink at dinner that night.
lt's a dead giveaway when you're not driving.
l never even noticed.
Think about it. Why would you?
- You're new to this, aren't you? - l thought l was the only one.
You've got to be having a laugh.
There's more of us out there than you can fathom. Most still drinking.
- Thanks. - More water, sir?
Well, you know what? l'm working this afternoon. What do you think?
Well, as long as you stick to sparkling, eh, and don't mix!
Come on, let's go crazy. Another bottle, please.
Thanks.
Oh...God.
So...
To friendship.
And to having a bloody good time...
- sober. - Do you really think that's possible?
Oh, yeah.
- Cheers. - Cheers.
Oh!
Look, we haven't got any muscle rub.
- Oh! - You'll have to try this.
Oh...
Anything...
Agh! l'm in agony!
You probably used muscles you haven't used for a long time.
Yeah, if ever.
Agh...
(Groans)
Please, can you do it?
- l'm not falling for that one. - l'm in agony!
Ooh! Right...
Shoulders only.
(Grunts)
Oooh...
Mmmmm...
(Sighs heavily)
l had lunch with Mark today.
Oh, yes?
Mm.
He's pleased with the work l've done on the book.
l'm feeling much happier about things, David.
Mmmm... That's fantastic.
What, the massage?
No, that you're feeling happier about things.
Yeah.
And the massage.
lt is good, isn't it?
Oh, hiya.
l was hoping to have a word.
Yeah, of course. Come in. Straight through.
l want to ask you to drop this court action.
lt's not in Laura's best interests.
What, she doesn't want us to adopt her?
She'd love you to, but she doesn't know about your baby.
- What difference will that make? - Laura's not an only child.
Her mother had another daughter after she was born.
Yes, we know. To a different father.
And he wanted nothing to do with Laura.
But think what she must have felt like,
rejected by her own mother when another child came along.
Well, hold on. We're not them.
We'd make every effort to ensure that didn't happen.
l know you would. But who's to say it would be enough?
Look...
Laura will be looking for you to fail her. Pushing you...
Testing you... And if it didn't work out...
well, l doubt if she'd ever trust another person again.
lt would work out. That's the whole point. We'd make it work out.
lf you care...
give her a chance to find another family.
♪ Lyrical strings
Thanks for being so understanding.
You know, all along we only wanted what's best for Laura.
Oh, l don't know. l don't like it.
You know what l mean?
What if Laura thinks we've rejected her as well?
Trust me.
Good luck.
Thanks.
Sorry.
- Bye. - Bye.
You OK?
l will be.
Doing the right thing doesn't make you feel better, does it?
Adam. Look.
ADAM: l hope she finds someone.
Right...
Home.
You can't stay. l'm expecting Jo.
Well, nice to see you, too.
l thought l'd pop round for a chat and bring you up to date.
What are these in aid of?
They're for Jo. l thought it was time l told her how l feel.
She's a good-looking girl.
But she's way out of my league. Once she gets...
Don't run yourself down. You're getting in shape.
- But it'll take time, won't it? - lf you stop throwing up...
(Door opens)
- l'll go. - No, don't make it obvious. Stay.
Only for a minute.
Hi! How are you?
Um...you know Suggs, don't you?
Hi, Gifford.
- Hi. All right? JO: We're just going for a drink.
Who are the flowers for?
They're er...
for Rachel.
Oh. Karen said she was OK.
Yeah. False alarm.
- Thanks for asking. JO: Cool.
Want to come upstairs for a minute? l'll just be a second.
- Sure. See you, guys. BOTH: See you.
- (Tuts) - (Whispers) Sorry.
Yeah. Me too.